grab my hand

when you leave
I feel hollow
a piece carved from my chest
I drop back in my murky pool
as the door slams shut

but when you were here
reality came back, full color
you felt so close
I wanted to lick the sweat from your chest

I told you my ugly pathetic sad secret
you loved me after
I held back some words
but I am feeling braver

the noose I strung myself
is feeling a little looser
I believe you when you kiss me
when our eyes meet

I’m speaking without words again
but this time you understand
I’m still underneath all this
you haven’t seen me open my wings yet

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but together tastes right

I pluck my eyebrows

shave missed patches on my legs

distracted by thoughts of your hands

reaching behind my back


set me free from this agitated sleepiness

killing minutes, dragging hours

to bring me closer to

your breath hot in my ear


competitive scales, who feels more

who craves more, who thinks more

about bodies, souls and minds


I would work the skin off my hands

to carve a block of time

to nibble, lick and digest you

instead of quick grasps

of slippery soap

that jumps and slides away

leaving me too clean


it feels like I’m always the one waiting

I’m always left behind

you got me and I fear you know it


but someone has to hold the hand of hearts